Only one is the real Zach Hampel, and has sworn

John: Oh, oh. We're in a lot of trouble here! Welcome back to "The Truth." Panelists, please open the affidavits in front of you and follow along with me as I read the sworn testimony of Zach Hempel

John: Don't be so accusatory. He's a youngster. Paula, on to you.
Paula: My two-year-old foster son took a basketball in the head at a Sparks game, and we didn't get to keep it. Number Two, explain the secret weapon.
#2: The secret weapon is a baseball glove, with a rubber band tied around the finger tips, with a string so that I can lower it down to balls that I cannot reach. It picks the ball up, so I can get the ball that's too out of reach.
Paula: Number Three, what's the proper technique .. Where would you position yourself for success?
#3: The outfields are usually a good spot, before the game.
Paula: Before the game?
#3: Yeah. In practice a lot of balls go into the outfield.
Paula: Oh, I see. Number One, where do you put these balls?
#1: I keep them in my room. Some of them are in file cabinets. Others are in large bins.

John: All right. continues with Allen Rachens.
Allen: Number One, I'll follow up. Where do you position yourself these?
#1: It depends. Before the game, during batting practice, obviously in the outfield, because a lot of players hit home runs, because the pitches are slower. But during the game, you know, by the foul pole, along the foul pole line.
Allen: Number Two, are you always in the stadium when you get these balls?
#2: Yes, most of the time.
Allen: Number Three, how much is that Mark MacGwire ball worth?
#3: It's not worth very much, because it was a practice ball.
Allen: Number One, same question.
#1: It's not worth very much, because it was given to me during batting practice.
Allen: Number Two, did you ever go to ?
#2: No.

Oh, all right. Tracey Bingham, on to you.
Tracey: I'm from Boston. I know the Red Sox. OK, anyway, Number One, is this secret weapon glove of yours, is this patented?
#1: No, it is not.
Tracey: OK. Number Two, how did you catch your first ball?
#2: It was given to me. By a player. Oh, caught! It was thrown to me.
Tracey: OK. So, OK, Number Three, was this given to you, this ball, or did you catch this ball?
#3: The first ball?
Tracey: Your very first ball.

John: Oh, all right. The bell has sounded. Time is up, and time their votes without discussion Is it Number One, Number Two, or Number Three? At this time I'll ask their votes as well, and I'll remind our audience at home $1,000 for every incorrect vote. If it's a clean sweep and they fool all of our celebrities and the majority of our audience, that is a $5,000 jackpot. So, we'll be back in a moment and find out and right here on " the Truth."

John: Welcome back to " the Truth." One of our challengers is the real baseball boy, Zach Hampel. Meshach, we're going with you. For whom did you vote?
Meshach: John, this is a really tough one. I really didn't have much at all, so I just looked at the three of them and I just said, "Now which one of these guys looks like he'd be sitting around playing with his balls all the time?" And I thought, "Number Three is the one!"
John: Number Three. All right. Paula?
Paula: In , I'm going . Number One ... I have no idea! I think there at the field. It's Number One.
John: Allen, for whom did you vote?
Allen: I've been fooled too many times, but Number One looks like a Zach Hampel, and he looks like he could be obsessed with a huge fortune of baseballs, and I went with Number One.
John: All right. Tracey, you've thought long and hard. Who's going your nod?
Tracey: It is very tough, but I'm going Three. I don't know ; I just am.

John: Open pocket there for Number Two. Right now let's find out Oh, rather overwhelmingly there for Number One. All right. Three votes for Number One. Two votes for Number Three. It's time now the real baseball boy, so will the real Zach Hampel please stand up?

John: All right. Zach, have a seat. We'll be back to you in just a minute.
Paula: I'm sick of all these lies!
John: Number One, you got three votes. You did a nice job. Who are you and what do you do?
#1: Thank you. My name is Adam Schreiland. I'm a senior at Emerson College in Boston, studying broadcast journalism.
John: Ah, great school. Home of Fenway Park, right there, baby! Number Two, who are you and what do you do?
#2: My name is Matt Fender and I'm a student here in Burbank, California.
John: Thank you again for with us. All right. Zach, have you not ... You say during foul .. or actually batting practice, right?
Zach: That's right. I have caught 54 balls during games.
John: During games, as well. And your average is six balls a game?
Zach: That's right.
John: When I was four, I used to Fenway Park with my little glove on my hand and I was convinced a ball, and I'd end up in tears at the end of the game when I never caught one. And you've averaged ...
Paula: The Red Sox felt the same way!
John: The editorial comments keep . You're talking about my team.
Zach: Can I show you the trick with my glove?
John: Sure. We want a demonstration here of .
Zach: OK. It starts by a rubber band over the tip of the glove, and I hook it outside the flap. And I put a magic marker inside the glove it open And of course this trick wouldn't work if I didn't have some string, which I normally keep hidden in the palm of my glove. And here's the fun part.
John: Ladies and gentlemen, the ball disappears! I tell you, not since David Copperfield have I been that impressed with a trick! Well, anyway, you ended up with three incorrect votes. Our team of challengers is going a well-needed $3,000. We want them. It was a lot of fun. Thank you for that.

Brings us to the end of the show, so sadly I have goodby to Meshach Taylor, Paula Poundstone, Allen Rachens, and, of course, Tracey Bingham. I'll see you next time right here on " the Truth."

Only one is the real Zach Hampel, and has sworn "To Tell The Truth"
Welcome back to " To Tell The Truth."
Starting at the age of 12, I set out to snag baseballs in every major league stadium across the country.
I'm doing so by using everything -- from foreign languages, to wearing the right clothes, and properly positioning myself to insure success.
While I have my favorite balls, including one from Mark MaGwire, I am still 8 stadiums short of reaching my field of dreams.
All right, panel and audience, all three of our young men here claim to be the real baseball boy.
Well, Meshach Taylor's going to start the questioning to find out .
It was given to me after batting practice at Shea Stadium, New York.
OK. That's kind of cheating , isn't it?
In batting practice a lot of balls go into the outfield.
Others are in large recycling bins.
Questioning continues with Allen Rachens.
Where do you position yourself to get these?
Number Two, did you ever go to where the Red Sox play ?
The bell has sounded. Time is up, and time for our celebrity panel here to lock in their votes without discussion
At this time I'll ask our studio audience to cast their votes as well, and I'll remind our audience at home we're paying $1,000 for every incorrect vote.
So, we'll be back in a moment and find out how everyone voted and who the real Zach Hampel is right here on "To Tell the Truth."
Welcome back to "To Tell" the Truth."
Meshach, we're going to start with you.
I really didn't have much to go on at all, so I just looked at the three of them and I just said ...
In a highly unusual, irregular bending of the rules, I'm going to continue the questioning.
I think that the balls should be left there at the field.
Number One looks like a Zach Hampel, and he looks like he could be obsessed with amassing a huge fortune of baseballs, and I went with Number One.
Who's going to get" your nod?
It is very tough, but I'm going to go with Three.
I don't know why; I just am.
Right now let's find out how our audience voted
It's time now to find out which one of our players here is the real baseball boy, so will the real Zach Hampel please stand up?
Thank you again for being with us.
You say a great deal of these balls are caught during foul .. or actually batting practice, right?
When I was four, I used to go to Fenway Park with my little glove on my hand and I was convinced I was going to catch a ball, and I'd end up in tears at the end of the game when I never caught one.
The editorial comments keep flying.
Sure. We want to have a demonstration here of how you use your glove.
OK. It starts by putting a rubber band over the tip of the glove, and I hook it outside the flap.
And I put a magic marker inside the glove to prop it open
Our team of challengers is going to be splitting a well-needed $3,000.
We want to thank them.
Brings us to the end of the show, so sadly I have to say goodby to Meshach Taylor, Paula Poundstone, Allen Rachens, and, of course, Tracey Bingham.
I'll see you next time right here on " To Tell the Truth."

Ann Salzmann
Intensive English Institute
University of Illinois